Jack's Purpose on the Island & Love, Suffering and Letting Go by Adrian McDonald

Jack....Don't Drink That:

In an earlier post I discussed the significance of LA X Jack from the S6 premier getting one bottle of vodka from Cindy instead of two. As LA X Jack never has to worry about a massive gash from 815 crashing, he does not 'need' the second bottle to sterilize the wound. Fine. Just as Jack does not need to the second bottle, we also know he certainly does not 'need' the one bottle either. Indeed, he should avoid any bottles. And when he goes to drink from the one bottle he was given, the plane shudders with turbulence and Jack spills his drink. What a fortunate twist of fate?

This was not the first time we saw this happen. It happens twice in S5's "316". The first is just after Ms. Hawking tells Jack he has to take something that belonged to his father and place it in Locke's coffin. Locke, as she explains, is a proxy (substitute) for Jack's father, or so he is told, and Hawking says they must recreate the circumstances of the original flight "as best they can." Why? I don't know, and neither did Jack.

Jack is not happy with Ms. Hawking's instruction, which clearly cuts him deeply. He was reconnected with the pain his father's death--Jack had yet to let go. Jack tells Hawking that her instructions are ridiculous. Hawking, in response, barks "stop thinking how ridiculous it is! And start asking yourself whether or not you believe its going to work....that's why it's called a leap of faith Jack."

Jack was uneasy, I think, with Ms. Hawking’s advice but also somewhat comforted (he would, after all, do it). After listening to Ben's beautiful, if not moving, retelling of the story of Thomas the Apostle, a conflicted Jack headed to a bar. But Jack never got the chance to take a sip of the drink before him in that bar. He ordered it, to be sure, but never drank of it. Just as he was about to raise it, he was interrupted by a call from his grandfather's retirement home, who was having trouble keeping gramps from trying to go off on adventures of his own.

At his grandfather’s retirement home, Jack “white rabbit” with black fur around its eye. Does this represent Jack at that point? Even something so white has some dark, or black. As good as Jack is, he has his demons, substance abuse being paramount at that time. And the interruption for Jack allowed him to discover his grandfather also, as fate would have it, a pair of Christian’s old shoes. Fate indeed.

The second time fate kept Jack from having a drink was just after he returned to his apartment, father's shoes in tow. After searching for a bottle (it was not easy to find either), Jack poured himself another drink. But just before he took a sip, he was again interrupted--this time by Kate, who had come to spend the night with Jack after deciding to return to the Island herself.

Why Hold On to Something That Makes You Feel Sad?

Kate gave Jack some wonderful advice the next morning, perhaps repeating a message that was finally getting through to him. Kate noticed the shoes and asked Jack about them. After Jack told her they belonged to his father and told her the story of about putting white sneakers on the body of his father, Kate asked "So why don't you get rid of them? Why hold on to something that makes you feel sad?" Although he would never bother to tell Kate (something she did not need or should know in any event) was that Jack did get rid of the shoes...he did let go.

Why did Jack need to give those shoes to John? It always bothered me. Why? Hawking did not say what Jack needed to give Locke; she did not say anything about the shoes. She just said something that belonged to his father. I don't think she knew anything about the story of the shoes. Of course the fact that it was his father's shoes provided wonderful symmetry, balance to the story. The shoes, as the last thing missing from his deceased father's casket, became the vehicle for Jack to do what had taken him so long to do--to do what Kate said....to let go. Let go, stop thinking and make the leap of faith. The only reason Jack had to give Locke something of his fathers, I think, was to complete this rite, the rite of letting go. And Ms. Hawking was the one who ritualized it. Without passing this rite, Jack would not be ready to return. Before Jack could make the leap, he had to let go. And that's precisely what he did. He is still learning this lesson, and he knows ! it.

Why Did Jack Return to the Island?

This has been another question that I have struggled with. Why did Jack want to return to the Island?

Reason 1-Save Everyone:
I was never sold on the saving everyone idea. If Jack were so concerned with saving everyone, he would have tried, it seems to me, to prevent the other 316 passengers from boarding the plane. He did ask Ben what would happen to them, but was strangely placated with Ben's response, "who cares." It’s not that Jack doesn’t care, its just that I think he was beginning to realize it was out of his hands. Out of his control.

Jack did not know about the bomb and Daniel's reset plan until well after he returned to the Island. So that was not the reason he returned to the island either. And even though he was certain it was his destiny to detonate the bomb and prevent 815 from ever crashing, this was not the case. Maybe it was part of it, but not the end goal.

While getting the bomb to the Swan was not his purpose for being on the Island, it does offer a glimpse at what really is motivating Jack, at least in part. Detonating the bomb, he is led to believe, prevents 815 from ever crashing. Kate asks him why he wants to stop the plane from crashing and Jack says its so everyone they lost can come back...all the pain and suffering will be erased. Kate responds that not everything that happened to them was bad, not all of it was suffering. But Jack replies, "enough of it was." Jack is in pain and he wants to make it go away. Drugs and alcohol didn't work, so Jack decides to go nuclear, literally.

When Sawyer confronts Jack in the jungle near the Swan, he demands to know why Jack is bent on detonating the bomb. Jack first says that Locke said it was their destiny to be on the Island, but before he can say more Sawyer stops him. Sawyer does not "speak Destiny" and understands that a man does something because he wants something...'what do you want Jack?' To this, Jack says (referring to Kate) "I lost her. I had her...and I lost her." Sawyer tells Jack that if he wants her, he should get up and go ask her. 'No' Jack says, "it's too late for that." Sawyer tells Jack that if his plan works, then they will land and go there own ways--they will never meet at all. "If it's meant to be, it's meant to be" Jack replies.

The last time Jack provided a reason for returning to the Island was in S6's "The Lighthouse." On their way to the Lighthouse, Hurley asks Jack why he came back. Jack tells Hurley that he was "broken" and foolish enough to believe that the Island could fix him. Jack was overcome with emotion, sadness, when saying this to Hurley. Jack may not think so, but I think the Island already had fixed him...or I like to think Jack had even fixed himself. But even that is not the reason he came back....Jack offers all of these different reasons to people because the truth of the matter is that he does not know why he is back. He does not know what he has to do...Jacob confirms this. And Jacob tells Hurley that Jack cannot be told what he has to do. Jack must figure it out by himself. Looking out into the ocean, I think Jack realizes this fact for himself. He understands that he has a purpose, a role to play, and this alone brings Jack a certain peace. I think Jack found tran! quility. Jack does not know what he will do, but finds peace in knowing he does have some purpose...whatever it is.

"At the Darkest Moment Comes the Light":

Joesph Campbell wrote "The black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come...at the darkest moment comes the light." Nowhere is this more true than Jack's encounter with Richard Alpert in the bowels of the Black Rock.

Alpert had lost his faith, his hope. He wanted to die. The Temple had been destroyed along with the mystical Dogen, clearly a powerful ally of any opposed to darkness. Locke is dead. The remaining candidates scattered. Sayid taken by darkness. Jacob is dead. Smokie reigns virtually supreme.

As the dynamite's fuse, lit by Jack, burns ever closer to apparent doom it is the "darkest moment." And then comes the light. The light is Jack, and the moment of "when the real message of transformation" had finally come was when he completely surrendered to the forces of fate and notions of destiny. Jack tells Richard he has "no idea why" he is on the Island, or what he is supposed to do but dying in the hold of the Black Rock is not it. The stick, of course, does not explode and in one of my favorite moments ever in all of LOST, Jack asks Richard "Wanna try another stick?"

The parallels to the Book of Jonah are apparent. The Black Rock is the whale. The story of descent becomes the story of ascent. (I think Sayid looking down the dark well at Desmond was another great example of this).
Love IS All You Need…But is it Totally Absent in LA X?

Love is all you need. This was the message in "Happily Ever After."

Happiness is not about having a 'good' job, having lots of money or even getting to travel the world. In LA X, Desmond has all these things and thinks he is happy. He tells Charlie he is happy as he mindlessly responds to messages on his blackberry. No Desmond, you are not happy. We, the audience, know this because he is not with Penny. And Charlie knows this as well and asks Desmond if had ever been in love. Not just love, but real love..."spectacular, consciousness altering love." And Charlie had seen it, in the exact time of his own "darkest moment", when 815 hit turbulence causing Charlie to choke on his bag of heroin. "It's over...everything starts to go dark...im slipping into the abyss...and then I see her." In Charlie's darkest moment came the light. The light was love.


Charlie calls the light of love something real, the truth. Charlie experienced the truth and the path to truth was Love. I have always thought LOST is at its best when its about Love. How can the world of LA X be the happy ending for our characters? Is love absent for everyone? And if it is is absent then that world, by definition, cannot be real; it cannot be the truth. Can it?

I don't know the answer. It appears Locke has love, in Helen. Is that not real? Jin and Sun may not be married in this world, but they are in love. Is that not real? Rose and Bernard are together and seemed to be glowing more brightly from their love than ever before. One of my favorite moments in the S6 premier was the smile on Jack's face as he how in love Rose and Bernard were on the plane.

But Sayid does not have Nadia. Sawyer does not have Juliet (I don't think he and Kate are meant to be, but who knows). Kate does not have Aaron (or for now Jack or Sawyer). Daniel does not have Charlotte. And, of course, Charlie and Desmond do not have it either with Claire or Penny. Again, I can't really speak to any of these things. I have to stay with Jack. And while I do not know if he will end up with her, I am certain of this: Jack's love is Kate. It always has been. Oceanic 6 Jack, unfortunately, was not ready for life with Kate.

What is Love?:

I suppose I agreed with Charlie...Love is truth. I suppose Love is like a painting. If you have to ask the artist what the meaning is, then you have not seen it. It's a feeling that defies words. Words cannot reach that place.

Thankfully, Campbell (and I know I mention him a lot, but bear with me) does not attempt to define love, at least romantic love, and talks instead of the notion of marriage. What is marriage? It is the "reunion of the separated duad" Campbell said. "Originally you were one. You are now two in the world, but the recognition of the spiritual identity is what marriage is." As for why the divorce rate is so high? Campbell says the idea of marriage in modern society is not marriage at all. If marriage is not the first priority in your life, then Campbell argues you are not married at all. I agree with this without reservation. In marriage, the two are in fact one. One not just in the biological sense, but One primarily in the spiritual sense.

I don't think Jack ever put marriage first, at least not with Sarah. He has done this more with Kate, showing more concern with her safety than his own, for example, putting her first. Therein lies the problem. No one is first over the other...both are first. Jack never bothered to fix himself. Unless both partners think in this manner, there can be no "we". The two are not one.

In LOST, the two timelines will merge. They cannot remain different because they are the same. They must merge and Love is the catalyst, or so it seems. I wrote in much more detail about this merging here:

We Are The Cause of Our Own Suffering....But We Also Need to Suffer to Become:

As much as I was blisffully charmed with Jack's new life in LA X and his relationship with son David...it is not real. We do not know David. We are not attached to David. He has no history. And without history, there can be no future. If Jack is to somehow merge his LA X self with Jedi Jack on the Island, he may have a hard time letting go of David. Shocker, I know. If David is not real, Jack, I think, may face the same problem he had in the past...letting go. Not only that, but letting go of something that may not have been real at all--only 'real' in Jack's head. For example, were Jack's father issues really that profound? Outside of Christian telling Jack as a child that he did not have "what it takes", was Christian really a poor father? To me, the answer is no. I came to see Christian as a pretty good father.

I think of how tender Christian was with Jack before he married Sarah. Christian said Jack was the most gifted surgeon in the city. Certainly Christian was flawed, but when he was trying to become a better man by treating his alcohol addiction, Jack thought his father was actually having an affair with his wife. In Jack's mind it made sense, but It was anything but the truth. The truth (aka Love) was that Christian went to Sarah to help Jack. Through Sawyer, Jack was able to learn that Christian was proud of Jack, though he never got a chance to tell him directly. We even find out that Jack's counting to five trick for overcoming fear was taught to him by his father. Clearly Jack was a believer in this teaching, but we never heard him credit Christian for it. Quite the opposite, Jack was angry at his father for doing it.

Rather than thanking Christian for helping overcome the paralyzing fear, Jack said to his father: "Dad...I know you don't believe in me, but I need them (the surgical team) to." To this Christian cuts to the heart of Jack's problem, "Are you sure I am the one who doesn't believe in you Jack?" And that's precisely it, Jack has spent his entire life without ever believing in himself. In trying to fix the problems of others, Jack never realized what he needed to fix most was himself. We are the cause of our own suffering. To balance this, I would like to add: we are the cause of our own salvation. But without one, there cannot be the other. Like so many things, they are one.

For all the pain and suffering Jack has endured, regardless if he brought it upon himself or not, Jack could never have become the man we see in the Black Rock lighting dynamite with Richard without it. Jack needed to experience all of that pain and suffering to undergo the "real message of transformation" at that "darkest moment." The message of needing pain is quite specific on LOST.

While skipping through time, Locke is able to determine exactly "when" he, Sawyer and company are in time after one of the flashes because he noticed the column of light from the hatch light up the dark sky. Locke tells Sawyer how he knew when they were and how, at that time, he thought the light meant something. "Did it"? Sawyer asks. "No, it was just a light." Sawyer asks why Locke didn't want to go and save his past self the time and grief. Locke said he "needed that pain" to get where he is.

The people in LA X may resemble the people we saw them become on the show, what they transformed into, but it lacks the suffering. Locke has Helen and his father? Really? No. Not really.

If Jack is Fixed, Will He End Up With Kate? If It's Meant To Be, It's Meant to Be:

I don't know the answer to this question. And Jack wouldn't know either. If it's meant to be, it will be. Only by surrendering to this notion can one find peace. Only by looking in the mirror can we see that we are, in fact, the cause of our own suffering. I love these messages on LOST. Our suffering allows us, if we can see it in our reflection, to become something better or fix that which ales us. .

Like Jack, I don't know what will happen. I do see him with Kate. But who knows? What was more important for Jack was that he looked into the mirror and decided to stop causing his own suffering and fixed himself to realize his potential. Does this earn one the return of "Lost love"? If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

Thank you for reading. If you liked my post, please visit my LOST blog at: http://lost-looking-glass.blogspot.com/